A Grand Unified Theory*

A Grand Unified Theory*

… Scraping our knees,

as fluid time flows,

months and years and days and weeks,

loving, living, cooking, caring,

our pain, our desires, our simple wishes,

lie neatly tucked away,

behind the clean linen in the guest-bedroom cupboard.

Whispering to ourselves, bleeding to feel alive, feeling a cold, distant cloak of invisibility shrouding our screaming silences.

A tender glance, a few comforting words,

remind us that we are still human,

picking away at still-raw sores, pacing around in our minds, searching for yet to be opened doors,

craving simple warmth, a kind word, a knowing nod, a shared tear,

holding each other, close by, yet not near,

grappling within, without,

at the gnawing fear,

I may have loved you too much,

my phantom love,

always present,

still you always, always, always,

manage to disappear …

* – A Grand Unified Theory is a model in particle physics in which, at high energy, the three gauge interactions of the Standard Model which define the electromagnetic, weak, and strong interactions, or forces, are merged into one single force. Wikipedia

yesteryear

yesteryear … … …

memory slips,

                        slides,

cascades,

                 through the blurred veil of time,

        sifting through memories,

of you,

            your loveliness ablaze,

sweeping across meadows,

                  my stranded heart still in flames,

                 the furnace burning bright,

                          raging in the darkness of this night,

                  coaxing nostalgic yearning,

over years left behind,

             between thoughts of kisses entwined,

                 

                 and still,

                 and yet,

this heart may never forget,

           the caress of your voice,

breezing between today,

           last week,

all the drifting yesteryears,

                     lost in your deepest eyes,

even as days turn to night,

even as time continually flies,

scattering pieces of my soul,

              hither and thither,

             knowing it may never be, again,

whole,

           ah! but the memories persist,

as summer begins to wither,

            you are all i remember you to be,

between the wild rose,

        amidst the thorns,

bathed in dawn’s dew,

I live,

        I breathe,

                        I savour,

the sweetest thoughts,

of you, only you …

            

running

… running,

                   in flight,

                                  bracing the currents,

                       thrashed against the cliffs,

                of jagged fate,

broken-in, kneaded into acquiescence,

worn-down, stretched-thin,

soon-to-be yesterdays trash,

dumped, strewn in the muck,

filling landfills of destinys rubbish bin,

bashed by chaotic waves,

headed for,

primed,

course set, for yet,

yet,

another crash …

                                          

          

the passion of my pen: you

the passion of my pen: you …

this pen dipped in ink, scribbles odes to you,

my fingers caressing your bare back, paints words of a love so true,

while in your eyes swirls the raging fire,

the passion of my pen scalds my being entire.

i may scribble a poem or two, my meagre words unable to convey,

the roaring furnace you have lit within me, this dervish who in a daze does sway,

sprinkling kisses on your honeydew lips,

feeling the desire raw and thirsting, from my soul to my fingertips.

your love has breathed life, awakening my slumbering heart,

to beat in tune with yours, scribbling oaths to never be, ever apart,

for a love so complete, so warm and so achingly deep,

was once only dreamed of, in waking moments of thought, and in the cauldron of my restless sleep.

these odes, these poems, are but scribbles on the parchment of shared time,

tucked away in the recesses of memory, finding solace in each paltry rhyme,

assailed by the nettles of days gone by,

emotions billowing like smoke into the bluest sky.

the passion of my pen is the mirrored reflection of your love,

the stroking of your hair, your head on my chest, the bounty we were blessed with, from the heavens above,

when days were humid and sultry, the nights torrid, bathed in the essence of need,

when all subtlety fled, as our hunger growled, wanting it all with an insatiable greed.

i recall those years of long ago, when we danced in tune with each heartbeat,

when our bodies lay entwined, the sweat dripping off flesh, as our minds and souls did effortlessly meet,

i can never forget those minutes that stretched into hours, in the Johannesburg thunderstorms, drenched in the cooling African rains,

your body my canvas, from the tips of your velveteen mountaintops, to the savanna of your rolling silken plains.

i recall every one of those minutes, i can hardly forget the warmth of your breath, as we sighed in unison, skin upon blazing skin,

and were i to never love again, were i to never savour that ecstasy, i will forever bask in the paradise of those memories, and i will constantly keep you, for you will always remain my heaven within …