discerning shapelessness, shadows pirouette, etching a kaleidoscope of colour … you see, I should have gazed more into your eyes, placid pools of clarity, yet now forever late, sewed eyes shut, blinded by regret, by tumultuous fate …
Tag Archive: mental-illness
waking up to emptiness, the synapses not firing, the gloom, the desolation, the feeling of worthlessness, all this brings me down,
and still, and yet, I’m no sad sack, am I,
no! I don’t want to feel this way.
I want the pain and emptiness to scurry away, leaving me to live,
just live, in peace,
day after gruelling day …
'illusory art' by Maya
another weekend repost 😊
my bipolar haze … … …
watching the stars fall,
ablaze,
scorching these nights,
the manic days,
and,
yet she remains,
a constant,
bulwark,
an anchor,
in my bipolar haze …
Billie Holiday by Banksy
… … … on cycles of trepidation,
on waves of flagellation,
galloping thoughts scatter,
misfiring synapses shatter,
twisted suspension of unbelief,
scorched neurons bereft of relief,
whistling tuneless solitary epics,
soon to be half forgotten relics,
my mind plunges,
my heart lunges,
grasping,
grappling,
clinging,
clawing,
scraping the veneer away,
revealing the emptiness of day,
succumbing to slumber,
soothing my meandering mind,
where thoughts no longer plunder,
and where my restless dreams,
are no more torn asunder … … …
the fog of war …
when does this ache cease
where does this path lead
if not
deep
into the quagmire
of
no-mans land
alone lonely
wishing it were
the nightmares
once so real
now all too true
as i lay
bogged down
stagnant entrenched
inert
yielding not an inch
yet still
still
not a moment passes
and
hardly a second fractions
till
thoughts of you invade my being
pummeling through me
a dazzling light
blinding ablaze
breathing fire
igniting
raw real
famished
desire to breathe
again
once more
in
my sleepless dreams
wounded
shrapnelled torn
forever
slipping into the blur
yet still
still
“its alright”
yet still
still
its your voice
that
through the fog
i hear
… a faint
murmur
years days moments minutes hours months weeks decades,
pockmarked,
weary,
skidding,
clinging onto,
raging roads,
hobbled,
shovelled,
dragged deep,
wrestling demons without,
within,
yet always,
always,
hugging hope,
as night yawns,
and a new day dawns …
Scribbled Verse 