Archive for November, 2018


A Rant …

artwork by banksy




A Rant …




… this moment in time, and the decades that have preceded it since the industrial revolution, have been studded with great breakthroughs in medicine and the sciences, among other ‘miracles’ of technology and human ingenuity.

However as we live in 2018, has the human race not become virtually inured to the ‘bigger picture’ – the ‘system’ chosen, or thrust down, being the system of profit at any cost.

Whether it be the grotesque arms industry or the equally grotesque Monsanto and Cargill and Halliburton corporations that wish to patent seeds – the very essence of food, and others of our world that have orchestrated an almost unbelievable feat of social and emotional and psychological control and engineering, or the corrupt leaders of governments pillaging the coffers that are meant to serve the people.

The fortunate ones in terms of material comforts and the rest that the ugliness of money can ‘do’ for them, compared to the 99% of whom we share this world with – those left out in the cold to eke out a miserable existence of the fight for just survival from hunger and the innumerable deprivations of poverty.

One need not look far.

The system and the placid and complicit acceptance of it has inured people to the point that hearts are hardened and that compassion has been dumbed down.

The self contained bubbles that ‘shield’ ‘successful’ humans from poverty and deprivation, but more frighteningly is the insidious injection of apathy and lack of empathy into daily life that has been the aim of the only-for-profit societies has done at the cost of fellow human beings who are stuck in 22 hour-a-day shifts in sweatshops and far too many dehumanising ‘work’ that is a necessity for the 1% to live the lives they do.

It is quite simple actually – earn as much as you can to buy the things you want and are ‘told’ that you need and make as much profit but at the price of the poor for no business or industry can run profitably if it gives its workers a decent salary or wages for then the grand aim of profit making is lost.

Don’t humans all live in cocoons?

In the office, a cocoon that makes human beings earn the money that is needed to live the life that is desired.

Cocoons at home in bubbles, surrounded by material possession that have been sold because of their ‘need’ and shutting out the ‘outside’ so-called ‘dregs’ of society, whom one gets irritated at when they knock on our cocooned bubbles once a week or so to plead for bread or some loose change.

Cocoons within ourselves, true feelings and emotions kept close in islands that are lonesome hearts because again it has been ‘sold’ to all that the McDonald’s ‘happy meal-life’ of always being ‘with it’ and always painting on smiles is the ‘way to go’ as people get more and more engulfed in the pressures of maintaining that lifestyle.

The pressure, or ‘persuasion’ to have kids go to the best schools, wear the finest clothes, have swimming and piano and other lessons where the parent, almost always the wife and mother, has to be on-call and on her toes all day juggling a career as well as being subjected to the daily grind of all of the above and more and then still having to prepare a meal or three – this makes the wife and mother exhausted both physically and mentally and emotionally and psychologically to the point when days are spent not really ‘living’ but just doing the ‘daily moms taxi runs’ for which we then need therapy and psychiatric medication for not all can bear all that and more without cracking or at the very least not being able to cope.

This anaesthetised ‘living’ – almost to the obscene point of even having the gall of comparing the 1% to the 99% because ‘look at the poor’ – they are so content and happy’.

No, the poor anywhere in the world are not ‘happy’ that they slog and sweat for long hours to return to shanties and urban ghettos in order to put some bread on the table – not even a table, as that is a luxury too.

So the system keeps on keeping on, piling pressure on cocoons separate from fellow beings and families and wives or husbands and mothers and siblings as the same cocoons are what family, friends, and people are ensconced in.

How can there be ’empathy’ in a system that breaks people down into compliant consumers and making sure that the cocooned state of meticulously crafted obliviousness, because how can humans ‘care’ for the ‘other-half’ when every hour of every day is precious and when the race is forever ongoing, always running and chasing time and being almost slave-like to the clock.

The system then further infects with the promise of bliss and joy if consumption of things people are made to think they need but really don’t – how many advertisements for alcohol are around which pummels all, where ‘The Main Man’ is surrounded by ‘pretty’ and scantily clad women – an ugly appeal to the basest of emotions – sheer unthinking lust.

Furthermore, every two years or so a new car model is unleashed with again advertising that seeks to ingrain the relationship between ownership of a particular thing, in this case a car to the ‘idea’ of the ‘ideal family – kids in the back seat having a laugh and the pretty wife looking over to the broadly grinning husband – so one has to have that car to add that ‘missing contentment’ to ones already cocooned lives.

The so-called cosmetics and beauty industry is probably the best example of all where an industry ‘sells’ their idea of their ‘ideal woman’ to women – maybe it’s maybelline that makes all desirable and pretty and not a hair out of place or maybe it is l’oreal because ‘you’re worth it’ and a worthy consumer also to make one desirable to whom – the man – always the man.

The louis vuitton handbags and the de beers diamonds, the ferraris and the chanel ‘haute-couture’, the mansions with 20 rooms for a family of 5, the ‘need’ to always ‘look’ the best and to attend parties and weddings shrouded by the ‘best clothes’ and for what? For the simple wish to look ‘better’ than the ‘rest’. Not to look presentable – nope – but to make a ‘splash’ and to be talked about with awe.

Of course all of this applies to men probably even more so as they have hand made saville row suits for their daily work lives and their thousands of dollars on their wrists for a clunky thing that just tells the time – the time that they have so very precious little of because to buy into the system is to aim to fulfill all that the system offers – first a toyota then a bmw and then a ferrari.

The patriarchal entitlement and the gender-based violence that countless women are subjected to by the very people they love and live with is a cancerous tumour that needs to be excised now, not tomorrow, but now.

We talk incessantly about the ‘need’ for simplicity and contentment while actively pursuing the very opposite.

The rituals of religion, all of them, overshadowing the very basic teachings and humane tenets that all religions espouse.

We are led to believe by the clergy of different religions that it is okay to amass wealth as long as ‘charity’ is ‘given’ – such an obscene word in itself making people feel so powerful with wealth that they may ‘give’ alms to the unfortunate poor.

The words of Dom Helder Camara – a Brazilian Archbishop, come to mind, who said the following:

“When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why the poor have no food, they call me a communist”.

If that statement resonates within anyone reading it – it means all is not lost at the altar of greed and imperialism and neo-colonialism and wars for oil and profit and influence.

It means that human beings are not totally lost in the temptation-filled cesspool of wealth and of power and of influence and of greed at any price, even the price of the blood of the miner who digs and dies to extract the shiny stone that has no earthly use other than being an ostentatious statement of which ‘class’ and what strata of society one ‘belongs’ to, and perhaps most grotesquely the shining little stone is tied together with ‘love for another person’ – the expression of love for another being that shiny shimmering cold and dead stone.

All is not lost when the countless human beings who are actively serving their fellow humans, not by flinging some charity their way, but but educating and imparting the skills needed to live a better life or to simply manage to feed their children and do so in a dignified way, and not being reliant on the alms of the ‘altruism’ we hear so much about in this world of pure unabashed greed and of standing and kicking down others to reach higher and higher on the ladder of ‘success’ – for every winner in the this system there have to be many many losers – that is built into the system.

What can we do about this gross obscenity we live in and pursue and are a part of, not because we are all greedy but because to eke out a living is to trample on others, giving us almost no choice.

What other systems of governance can we turn to in order to effect real and meaningful change.

Not many at all. Communism was tried and failed. Protectionist isolation was tried and failed. And a few more also tried and failed.

If there is a ray of hope it has to be that the people, us all, rise up to demand social equality for all our fellow human beings – even at the expense of our own personal cocoons being punctured.

A system of professional and free universal health care for all. A system of free and compulsory education for all.

A social contract between the government and the people that we may not all live lavish lives but that the lives we shall lead shall not be on the backs of those whose only crime was the accident of birth into poverty.

This may or may not effect real change – and certainly will not obliterate all the ills of this unjust world but wouldn’t it be a worthy goal to aspire towards – the service of our fellow living beings – our human family, the fish in our seas, the grandeur of nature and animal species not killed for profit, and for the active search for and working towards a world that is ecologically healthy so that future generations do not look back on us as those who failed not just each other as human beings but this entire planet called earth and the millions of other living beings and trees and plants which we share the world with.

It will take time.

But is it not a point from which we make a collective start moving forward.

I think so.

PS: On the other hand, who am I scribbling this for?

The ‘other half’ may not get to read this, they would need a cellphone and that too only a phone that is recent enough to run apps at the like which of course means a price will have to be forked out for a data-bundle – so I am obviously the 1% – as always thinking and believing that ‘I’ know what is best for ‘them – the poor of the world’ and ‘I’ again as always am speaking to you and I and not the ‘other-half’.

So no, this is most definitely not for ‘the other half’ who live and are beaten down by the system daily, and who certainly doesn’t need someone like me to spout the above with the presumption of knowing what their life is like every day.

So maybe it is just for me and for you.

Or maybe and probably more close to the point, it is just me absolving myself of guilt for a few hours or a day just because I scribbled something that mentions the words ‘system’ and ‘capitalism’ and the other platitudes people like me throw around when the convenient time presents itself – obviously after a steaming cup of not just any but the finest tea while lying on my bed surrounded by the very wealth and privilege I rail against.

Or it is even more subtle and dangerous – my attempt at appearing to sound like a humble man of sorts – not that any of this hasn’t been said and written a million times before but again to assuage my guilt and of course to puff my ego and my cigar a little more – scribble something about inequality blah blah, again sipping fine tea from a fine cup lying on a fine bed propped up on fine pillows surrounded by fine views of nature and far removed from the cacophonous ‘other’.

Yes, because I will rail against ‘my own’ but never shall I surrender ‘my life’ to be a part of the whole.

That would be so much more difficult and would mean yanking myself out of my own comfort zone, so instead, it is far more easier to just scribble a rant, because I am so ‘progressive’ and ‘liberal’ and filled with the most humane of values.

To quote Bono of the music group U2, in the song “Silver and Gold” from the album “Rattle and Hum” …


Am I buggin’ ya – I don’t mean to bug ya

from the Nelson Mandela Foundation

https://mars.nasa.gov/insight/timeline/landing/entry-descent-landing/


NASA’s Mars Insight Lander



we are starstuff …

(inspired by Dr. Carl Sagan)




stringed, strung, cobbled together, strands of DNA sewn from the cosmic rubble,

innumerable galaxies, theoretically plausible, infinite universes side by side,

floating in the quantum cauldron, within a bubble.



flotsam and jetsam in spaces between spaces,

where time, and days, kisses and tears, fears and years,

embroider the quilt of a multitude of races.



the vastness blurring much, grinding us down at times, into cosmic dust,

yet through stoic will, through love held deep, we rebuild again from crumbling rust.



starstuff, is all we are,


hewn through eons, within us, and into the stellar void so far.



starstuff is all,


we ever were,


starstuff is from where we came to be,


starstuff:

you, and me.



        ________

.

inspired by Dr. Carl Sagan 

the legend. the humanitarian – Dr. Carl Sagan

art by Banksy




talkin’ cynical self-absorbed lovey-dovey blues …



All those hazy moons ago, when we slept in each others arms, when we felt we were blessed, wearing those 24-carat gold matching lucky charms,

we who knew the paradise that lay ahead, the glitterati loving us – the perfect couple, who were hotter than blazing hot in bed.



All those sunshiney days of way back when, we kissed deep, our chakras aligned so in-tunely bloody zen, sinking into the obliviousness, the vacuum that was our entire universe
then,

unaware of all else, of anyone around us as we breezed through life, floating past it all, lost in a marshmallow haze, as we sank deeper into our carefree daze.



Kisses and caresses, ensconced in our selfish crevasses, not giving a hoot, as long as you reeked of french perfume, as long as I showed-off my obscenely expensive silk suit,

as long as we valentined and new yeared ever on, blinded to the real world and all that was wrong, just so that we disappeared in each others eyes,


never sparing a thought about this, our earth, our world, as we trapezed by the multitudes, the throng,

where we should really, for heavens sakes, be simply human,

and to at least, at the very least, try to belong.




art by Banksy

A Grand Unified Theory* 







A Grand Unified Theory*




… Scraping our knees,

as fluid time flows,


months and years and days and weeks,


loving, living, cooking, caring,


our pain, our desires, our simple wishes,


lie neatly tucked away,


behind the clean linen in the guest-bedroom cupboard.


Whispering to ourselves, bleeding to feel alive, feeling a cold, distant cloak of invisibility shrouding our screaming silences.


A tender glance, a few comforting words,

remind us that we are still human,


picking away at still-raw sores, pacing around in our minds, searching for yet to be opened doors,


craving simple warmth, a kind word, a knowing nod, a shared tear,


holding each other, close by, yet not near,


grappling within, without,


at the gnawing fear,


I may have loved you too much,


my phantom love,


always present,


still you always, always, always,


manage to disappear …



* – A Grand Unified Theory is a model in particle physics in which, at high energy, the three gauge interactions of the Standard Model which define the electromagnetic, weak, and strong interactions, or forces, are merged into one single force. Wikipedia




yesteryear … … …




memory slips,

                        slides,

cascades,

                 through the blurred veil of time,

        sifting through memories,


of you,

            your loveliness ablaze,


sweeping across meadows,

                  my stranded heart still in flames,

                 the furnace burning bright,

                          raging in the darkness of this night,

                  coaxing nostalgic yearning,


over years left behind,

             between thoughts of kisses entwined,

                 

                 and still,

                 and yet,


this heart may never forget,

           the caress of your voice,


breezing between today,

           last week,


all the drifting yesteryears,

                     lost in your deepest eyes,


even as days turn to night,


even as time continually flies,


scattering pieces of my soul,

              hither and thither,

             knowing it may never be, again,

whole,

           ah! but the memories persist,

as summer begins to wither,

            you are all i remember you to be,


between the wild rose,

        amidst the thorns,


bathed in dawn’s dew,


I live,

        I breathe,

                        I savour,


the sweetest thoughts,


of you, only you …

            





… running,



                   in flight,

                                  bracing the currents,

                       thrashed against the cliffs,

                of jagged fate,


broken-in, kneaded into acquiescence,


worn-down, stretched-thin,

soon-to-be yesterdays trash,


dumped, strewn in the muck,

filling landfills of destinys rubbish bin,


bashed by chaotic waves,

headed for,

primed,


course set, for yet,

yet,


another crash …

                                          

          



the passion of my pen: you …




this pen dipped in ink, scribbles odes to you,


my fingers caressing your bare back, paints words of a love so true,


while in your eyes swirls the raging fire,


the passion of my pen scalds my being entire.




i may scribble a poem or two, my meagre words unable to convey,


the roaring furnace you have lit within me, this dervish who in a daze does sway,


sprinkling kisses on your honeydew lips,


feeling the desire raw and thirsting, from my soul to my fingertips.




your love has breathed life, awakening my slumbering heart,


to beat in tune with yours, scribbling oaths to never be, ever apart,


for a love so complete, so warm and so achingly deep,


was once only dreamed of, in waking moments of thought, and in the cauldron of my restless sleep.




these odes, these poems, are but scribbles on the parchment of shared time,


tucked away in the recesses of memory, finding solace in each paltry rhyme,


assailed by the nettles of days gone by,


emotions billowing like smoke into the bluest sky.




the passion of my pen is the mirrored reflection of your love,


the stroking of your hair, your head on my chest, the bounty we were blessed with, from the heavens above,


when days were humid and sultry, the nights torrid, bathed in the essence of need,


when all subtlety fled, as our hunger growled, wanting it all with an insatiable greed.




i recall those years of long ago, when we danced in tune with each heartbeat,


when our bodies lay entwined, the sweat dripping off flesh, as our minds and souls did effortlessly meet,


i can never forget those minutes that stretched into hours, in the Johannesburg thunderstorms, drenched in the cooling African rains,


your body my canvas, from the tips of your velveteen mountaintops, to the savanna of your rolling silken plains.




i recall every one of those minutes, i can hardly forget the warmth of your breath, as we sighed in unison, skin upon blazing skin,


and were i to never love again, were i to never savour that ecstasy, i will forever bask in the paradise of those memories, and i will constantly keep you, for you will always remain my heaven within …





talkin’ self-indulgent blues




talkin’ self-indulgent blues



I’m talkin’ self-indulgent blues,

ramblin’ and a-rolling along,

on cobblestones,

here and there along the alleyways of this life,


seeking not much,

as such,


a few scattered smiles,

after all the miles,

more open roads, less clogged strife,


caravan-serais of hope,

of peace,

where the din briefly does cease,


where simple ways,

of bygone days,


seem cooler than the respite of the shade,

as ages pale,


and as words fade,


I’m still a-walkin’ alone,

flotsam and jetsam blurring my eyes,


as sand gets kicked and the dust flies,

my heart thrashed against cold stone,


while the mirage persists,

the promise of free skies,


still,

just there,

within reach,


slipping further into myself,

as the floodgates breach,


so don’t worry about me no more,


I’m still a-ramblin’ and a-rolling,


and know this too,

for it be true,


it is you,

who remains,


after moulted skin falls,

when the closing walls,

squeeze my straightjacket,


threatening to seal my fate,

into a vacuum-shrunk packet,


no, don’t worry about me no more,

my head is upright,

though my soul may be sore,


but I’m still a-ramblin’ and a-rollin’,


with you,


immersed deep in my core,

forever more … …





so near, and yet so very far …




I hear the birdsong,

early in the summer dawn,


knowing you hear the same call,

of the flying hopes that soar through boundless skies,


feeling an instantaneous bond, forged,


strengthened, within,

with you,


as sure as daylight blankets each star,

you are with me,

within me,


so very near,

yet, still,

               so agonisingly far …



humanity lost?





Humanity ?


us men,

almost always,

men,


myopic, impotent men,


our manliness oozing, seeping,

dripping,

soaking,


in swathes of red,

scarlet blood on infant skin,


hardened,

caked,

dried on cold, dead flesh.





Who am i,

a man,


myopic, impotent,


my swagger puffed on conceit,


my country right or wrong,

my god not yours,

my culture your caste,

tribe, sect, ideology … … …




Who am i ?


a man ?

knitted into,

shared humanity ?




Perhaps ’tis time,

to let this rotten, festering,

glossy, botoxed, tucked, trimmed, diseased skin,


moult,


laying stark this sham,

this theatre,


these lies, the maggots burrowing deep,


into man,


chiselling, smashing,

beheading, hanging,

shooting, bombing, drone-ing, killing, raping, torturing, killing, killing, killing,


excising man,

ripping man out of humanity.




Yes,

i am man




Banksy



scarred by gentle caresses,

ripped apart by tender kisses,


fractured within,

a ceaseless masqurade without,


when,

           does the ache mend,

lose its sting,

                       soften the blows,


while destiny,

                        fate,

    tomorrows not yet dawned,


shedding tears for pain unmourned,

                     battered blue,

                     and black,


always an arms reach away,

from my weathered backpack,


to venture, to plunge,


into the waters of chance,

where hopes dreams joys,

all dance,


a lifetime away,

yet embossed on the mindscape,


a fleeting moment,

vanishing,

                  like an eternal nostalgic glance …


                     



what is this yearning,


this furnace, this cauldron,


raging, burning.




this need,

this ache,


these dreams,


entwined, woven in clandestine half smiles,


stealing glances, across forgotten years,


endless miles …



Dew

Artwork from Google



Dew …


Dew, like tears,

envelopes the morning rose,


petals glistening,

remnants of night,

echoing across the hue infused plain.



Fleeting dew,

like murmuring rain,

caressing each petal,


while far beyond the flowers of morn,


memories of the dew,


remain …



Artwork from Google

the veiled connection

from google



the veiled connection … 




when two souls connect, far beyond the constraints of place, of that or of this lifetime,


when two hearts connect, thud-thuddingly beating to the same rhyme,


when two minds connect, forging a kinship beyond the shackles of merciless time,


a veiled connection, an intricately woven bouquet of emotions begin to intertwine.




the connection that fuses, melding two people, must be restrained by circumstance and societal norms,


the connection that fuses, melding two people, can hardly be truly known, for love appears in infinite forms,


the connection that fuses, melding her thoughts with mine, caresses each moment as each moment magically transforms.




such are the frivolous machinations of fate,


such are the oblivious workings of time, at times too early, at times just a second or two too late,


such are the truths we realise but at what cost, for the key handed down to us may not be for our specific gate.




the random sense of humour that destiny and fate do often betray, leaves scars, not smiles along the way,


the random sense of humour that life often displays, condemns a soul to the bleakness of the foggy grey,


the random sense of humour that determines who loves, and who doesn’t, seem like a trick that the rolling dice of fate may play.




the timing of a veiled connection forged in destiny’s blurry haze, leaves hearts and souls scorching, ablaze,


the timing of a veiled connection often determines the bends in many pathways, rarely missing a beat to reduce feelings into a series of tragi-comic plays,


and so it goes, that the timing of a veiled connection is crucial to the direction the pendulum of love sways,


more often than not abandoning souls,


to be forever lost in an indecipherable maze …



from google

on forgetting

Artwork from Google





on forgetting …



these days, these nights,

slicing to the core,

momentary joys, buoys,

merely afloat as beacons,

for lost travellers on the waters, in flight,


holding on,

onto, clutching close,

hugging,

clichés aside,

holding on for dear life,


while days turn into more nights,


nights into years,


passing us by:


spectators,

ground down on rehashed tales,


finally, feeling the waft of fresh air,


knowing at last, at last,


the past would really, truly,

be the past …



Artwork from Google

They’re prepping for a race war. And they see Trump as their ‘ray of hope’

https://cnn.it/2DyzMzX

NOTE: this is the drivel that is being spouted – neo-nazi and neo-fascist and apartheid- style rhetoric and hate – all based on spurious “facts” and on outright lies. 

South Africa, and non-white South Africas have NOT targeted “white” South Africans – on the contrary President Nelson Mandela and subsequent presidents and Mandela’s party, the majority party the African National Congress (ANC) has since the end of Apartheid in 1994 NEVER ordered or even mentioned a systematic “race-war” against white South Africans.

On the contrary white South Africans today live in the many old “white” suburbs and yes, there is a serious crime situation but South Africans of EVERY race are affected and more so the African majority, being the majority are the highest, percentage wise, victims of violent crime. 

This very dangerous and divisive narrative that is being spewed by hate groups around the world as they connect with each other on the web and elsewhere is toxic, corrosive, and very dangerous to the work-in-progress that South African society is still engaged in given the centuries old legacy of colonialism and the decades of Apartheid tyranny and racial oppression. 

We dismiss these attempts at sowing division in South Africa and we will not let the forces of hate and racial-superiority derail our common objective of living up to the Freedom Charter’s opening words –

“We, the People of South Africa, declare for all our country and the world to know: that South Africa belongs to all who live in it, black and white, and that no government can justly claim authority unless it is based on the will of all the people.”

https://www.sahistory.org.za/article/freedom-charter



we THE people …



as the forces of reaction grow louder, as the fascism of right-wing politics seem to be burgeoning, as the misogyny and racism and attacks on the rights of those who love differently echoes through the corridors of power, as all of this and so much more fills the air we breathe with a noxious stench, may we the people resist! may we the people erect the barricades, may we the people look back to all those brave and courageous souls who stood upright and fought the battles of yesterday – and not give in to despondency, may we the people resist and in resisting may we send a clear and resounding message to the forces that choose to divide, not unite, engender narrow nationalism not fraternal internationalism, may our message to them be clear, concise and loud – no pasaran! you shall not pass, for though you may wield the whip of power, we the people shall not give in to your tunnel vision of the politics of hate and divisiveness, for We The People always have been, and shall remain many, many more. Take heed of history for you stand rickety on the losing side and lose you shall, despite your gains here and there, lose you shall and lose you will, for We The People have been and always shall be many, many more. many more than the 1%, many more than the vultures of capital and greed, many more than you are, and ever shall be.


We The People are many, many more*



Amandla!

Venceremos!

Aluta Continua!

We SHALL Overcome!



* – slogan from Ken Loach’s film “Tierra y Libertad” or “Land and Freedom” on the Spanish Civil War. 



Capitalism 101



walking down pathways strewn with nettles,


swept along alleyways where dust settles,


always seeking respite from the nagging ache,


quarantined for a bit from society so fake,


where all that matters is the cash you rake,


throttling each other for the cents you make …



the nomad …

Baobab Tree – artwork from google



the nomad …



picking up, slivers of life, hewn into flesh,


leaving once again, clinging onto moonbeams, shards of sunlight once dazzling and warm, thrashed by howling fate,

lost in echoes of yesterdays hope,


shuffling onward, one step at a time, seeking not much but enough, always enough,

between concrete hearts and steely grime,

seeking absolution, in penitence resigned,


to more scribbles,


more paltry rhyme …



the city of gold – joburg skyline from google

Artwork from Google



just mush …



drowning in your eyes, tongue-tied,


you said i was a lush,

intoxicated by you, was i,


but instead i lied,

calling you my pineapple crush,


when all along i was afflicted, addicted, with nowhere left to hide,


adrift in the swirling sea of your love, and though tempus fugit, time flies,


i still feel that rush,


gazing into the ocean of your eyes,


reducing me still, today,


into an unabashed lush,


so forgive me this scribble,


this ode to you,

and all this unashamed mush …



Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google



lost | broken …



lost, broken,


alone,

in a foggy crevasse,


wedged between


sanity | madness | anguish.




i lose, break,

memories taunting,

waking thoughts,


stripping me bare | naked | exposed.




i survive, barely breathing,


slipping deeper,

into nothingness,


feeling little | shattered | numb.




i am incomplete, without you,

fatigued,


gnawed by emptiness | desolation | pain.




i persist, each breath futile,


crushed, yet alive,


comforted knowing only,


that you breathe | you live | and that you love …



Artwork from Google

in the deep

Artwork from Google



in the deep …


flailing, thrashing for gulps of air, when well-meaning words ricochet, and emotions in the deep lay,


when one is yanked into the chasm of the deep, blankly staring at the ceiling, chasing fleeing sleep,


alone, with misfiring neurons coaxing, inviting, paving alleys for gloom to slowly seep, when pangs of emptiness deeper still, begin to creep,


sleep vanishes, ushering waking nightmares in, a jangling discord of the day, the night, and of yesterdays din,


one reaches for slivers of hope, the double edged scimitar of life, the jagged rawness of seemingly unending strife,


ah but seeing a solitary shard, the lifeline of coarse hope, the being entire reaches out, digging in fingers to get a foothold, on that slippery slope,


and as dawn approaches, gently ushering in day from night, one feels renewed, rejuvenated, in the soft glow of morning light,


for it is the fragile strands of the new morn, keeping darkness at bay, nestling petals with the dew of hope, against the odds, 


welcoming new life,

banishing the pangs of emptiness away …



 

Artwork from Google

timing

Artwork from Google





timing …



aren’t we all

at times …



fragmented

broken

hypocritical

deliriously happy

mean

generous

pained

lost

hopeful

alive

numb

lonely


alone?


at times? right.




your timing is intolerable‘, she used to say …




Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google



talkin’ heartbreak blues …



… jingling and a-jangling between insipid day and fungal night, rumbling from those spirituals of yore, in a time way yonder back before, you pirouetted into my days and my nights, when pain was felt, though never this deep, this raw, that rotten gnaw deep in my core, compelling me to scribble this scribble, as i hyperventilate and as my broken mouth begins to dribble, these sentences, these words, these empty noises, barren drums, calling out, since you left, rendering me mutely bereft, just words, barren drums calling out to you, wherever you are and whoever you are today, now …



Artwork from Google

she said …

Artwork from Google



she said that she had seen them all.


the promise-makers, the vow and oath-takers, the silken tongued smooth talkers, the quiet intense brooders.


she asked me if I could love her. truly love her.


I said that I would spend our lives trying.


it’s enough‘, she said.



Artwork from Google

When we Kissed

Artwork from Google



When we Kissed …



​when you kissed me, our tongues waltzed in symphonic harmony,


teasing the crescendos as we sipped ambrosia in our tango of passion.



when we made love, our bodies fused, in singular unison,


the sweat mingled with the desire to soak in as much of the nectar of love.



when we walked, hand in hand, the powdery beach beneath our feet, 


we became one with nature, our love a testament to the unison of complete surrender.



when we spoke of times past, and tomorrows yet to dawn,


we felt the tug of kindred spirits, so elusive until now.



when we gazed into each others eyes, 


we felt ourselves drowning in a maelstrom of unquenchable togetherness.



when we kissed again, and again, as we do now,


we bask in the sunlight, of a love impossible to explain,



a love that weathered the seasons, the coming of autumn,


through life’s pain, and through the slicing barrage of fate’s icy rain …



Artwork from Google

Comrade Nelson Mandela meeting my mother after 27 years – Sweden 1990

Comrade Nelson Mandela’s letter of condolence to my father on the day my mother passed away


a bit about my family …


https://afzalmoolla.wordpress.com/2018/10/07/my-family-a-south-african-anti-apartheid-journey-through-the-seasons/



with Comrade Winnie Mandela, sharing with me stories of my mum and her – who often worked together in the 50s and 60s and were comrades



The Women …


(for the countless women, names unknown, who bore the brunt of Apartheid, and who fought the racist system at great cost to themselves and their families, and for my mother, Zubeida Moolla)



Pregnant, your husband on the run,
your daughter just a child, a few years old,

they hauled you in, these brutish men,
into the bowels of Apartheid’s racist hell.



They wanted information, you gave them nothing,


these savage men, who skin just happened to be lighter,

and White was right in South Africa back then.



You did not cower, you stood resolute,

you, my mother, faced them down, their power,


their ‘racial superiority’, their taunts, their threats.



You, my mother, would not, could not break,

You stood firm, you stood tall.



You, like the countless mothers did not break, did not fall.



You told me many things, of the pains, the struggles,

the scraping for scraps,

the desolation of separation
from your beloved children,

by monstrous Apartheid, by brutish men,


whose skin just happened to be lighter.



You told me many things, as I grew older,


of the years in exile, of the winters that grew ever colder.



You were a fighter, for a just cause,
like countless other South African women,

you sacrificed much, you suffered the pangs,


of memories that cut into your bone, your marrow,

you resisted a system, an ideology, brutal and callous and narrow.



Yes, you lived to see freedom arrive, yet you suffered still,


a family torn apart, and struggling to rebuild a life,

all the while, nursing a void, that nothing could ever fill.



I salute you, mother, as I salute the nameless mothers,

the countless sisters, daughters, women of this land, who fought, sacrificing it all by taking a moral and principled and valiant stand.



I salute you, my mother, and though you have passed, your body interred in your beloved South African soil,

you shall remain, within me, an ever-present reminder,

of the cost of freedom, the struggles, the hunger, the toil.


I salute you!


Viva the undying spirit of the women Viva!


(for the brave women of South Africa, of all colours,
who fought against racial discrimination and Apartheid)



Comrade Nelson Mandela and my father – sometime in the 1950s

Artwork from Google



Hand in Hand …



take my hand‘, she said, as we walked on splintered glass,


we are together, braced for all that may come to pass‘,


we walk hand in hand today too,


traversing this world, that is often cold and untrue …



Artwork from Google

She is my All

Artwork from Google



She is my All …



she is my all,

picking me up whenever I fall,


walking beside me, fierce and tall,


unafraid pain may yet befall.



my all, my strident constant, breathing away aches in an instant.


she is my all.


she is all.




Artwork from Google

Johannesburg sunset – photograph from google




i stand alone. 




1.



i stand alone, though never lonely,


she rests within me, and ’tis with  her i long to be.




i stand alone,

though hardly disconsolate,


she sprinkles colour deep within me, a dazzling rainbow for me to see.




i stand alone,

at rest and with hope,


her soul caressing my edginess, her memory a soothing balm helping me to cope.




i stand alone,

her heart a part of mine,


our emotions are one, bound by tight twine.




2.



i do not stand alone, for we stand side by side,


our love in tune, with the coming in of the tide …



Johannesburg skyline – artwork frkm google

Artwork from Google



missing you …



in times, lonely, alone,

in moments of raucous cacophony,


during radiant sunshine,

in the depths of coldness all around,


thoughts of you,

memories of you, abide,


cleansing my soul, my heart, my being entire,


scorched by a yearning, an ache of desire,


washing across me,

engulfed by the incoming tide,


yet the furnace rages,

fuelled by the warmth of your overwhelming fire …



Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google




late-night meanderings …




thoughts

snap-shots

vivid memories



the

depths of your eyes


the brush of your hair


the fragrance of your smile …


… snap-shots

    oil on canvas


    thoughts


 of you


keeping me company


along the roads

           by-lanes

           and

alleys of hope


burning

raging


mile

       

        upon


                  mile …





Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google



Pandit-Ji* – A Poem for Jawaharlal Nehru.

(November 14th 1889 – May 27th 1964)




 


1.


The moon cast an enveloping shadow over the teeming multitudes,

as they made their tryst with destiny**,

with you as the bearer of the light,

and at the stroke of the midnight hour,

you emerged an icon, from the long and desolate night.


Long years had passed,


since those humid evenings spent,


languishing in jail,

yet your mind remained unshackled,

putting words on paper in the dim candlelight,

as the gaudy glare of empire began to pale.



2.


Today,

you live,

within us,


though not amongst us,

and,

your discovery***,

your glimpses***,

smoulder within me,

your immortal words,

my compass.



I am now,

the soul of nations,

once suppressed,

that have,

found utterance**.


I am now,

me.


I am now,


finally,


free …


 




* – ‘Pandit-Ji’ was the name that Jawaharlal Nehru, the first Prime Minister of independent India, was respectfully called.

** – excerpts from Jawaharlal Nehru’s “Tryst with Destiny” speech on 15th August 1947.

*** – two of the few books written by Nehru – “Glimpses of World History” and “The Discovery of India



Quote from Google

dreams fade

Artwork from Google




dreams fade …



dreams fade,


eventually slithering

into

pale fogginess.



years recycle years,


grinding down shellshocked lives.


merely more raw

fodder for the beast.



oh but not hope!

hope persists.


hope scalds mercilessly,

jabbing at

the

core.


hope twists knives,


a

teasing

constant

ache.


hope!


the very ache

that

assures me,



that,


i


am


alive …



Artwork from Google




M A S Q U E R A D E …




waltzing,

arms interlocked,


palpably frigid,

eyes opaque,


unseeing,

willfully oblivious,


tucked away,

from the reverberations of sin,


lost in the glossy haze,

adrift,

afloat,


on winged dreams of tin,


sold,

bartered,


for a glimpse,

of the promise,


of better days,


leaving behind this sorry charade,


giggles galore,

as the booze flows,


drowning the dead,

unravelling the uncouth,


lying just beneath the veneer,


of this numb masquerade …

sprinkled scribbles

Billie Holiday – Artwork by Banksy



sprinkled scribbles …





sprinkled scribbles,

sketched against skin,


softly soothing, dipped in inked nectar, infused with desires unleashed,


to live, to taste the salt of sweat on flesh, to walk in the torrential rain, drenched in perennial desire,


scorching, broiling, slowly inflamed, centuries, months, moments, decades,


the moth to the fire …





Quote by Carl Sagan – from Google




pseudoscience and new-agey unreason …




see the charlatan,

peddling hope?


selling, always selling,

well-meaning, no doubt,


hope and dope,


the dope is a bit strange,

somewhat

common-sensical at times,


appealing to our innate emotions as sentient beings,


as human beings who feel.





the hope is toxic,

overfilling the ocean that is you within the cosmic fabric of our shared consciousness,


yes something like that,


unreason with frills,


promises of seizing ones inner ‘negativity’,


and unshackling all that keeps the ‘soul’ from being ‘receptive’ to help –


what a sham!


so, please,

don’t bamboozle me,

you see,


with flim-flam,

obscure words,


plumbing the quantum realm,

with belief, not reason,


soft, comforting, wishy-washy answers perennially uttered,

for every season:


quantum healing,

chakras of inner light,

elements of fire and water,

in a marinade of love and light,



don’t bamboozle the needy,

just because you’re greedy,


perhaps not for money,

but for doing the right thing


( naturally, your belief makes you feel you just “have to” share this amazing thing revealed to you and a few others )


so again imploring you, I say,


stop peddling the intoxicating dope of false hope,


with the glazed-eyed zeal of the one knowing the truth,


because you don’t,


there’s science for that sort of thing,


and by the way,

instead of hurling glib, shallow answers,


perhaps listen to someone else’s voice for a change,


not just your inner one,

preaching all across the open range,



for is true humility not the ability to acknowledge that, no, we don’t know all the answers,


we may never know all the answers,


but we shall certainly keep asking the questions,


and so, really,

it is quite alright to say,




“I do not know”





. . .









Quote by Carl Sagan – from Google

Artwork from Google



vagabond verse …




running against slippery winds,


fragments of past lives,

tugging at the heels,


shedding tired breaths,

moulting yesterdays skin,


inflamed by passions,

raging,

swirling,


deep within,


gathering the shards,

cobwebbed,

mangled,


inside,

tattered embers simmering dim,


heartstrings plucked,

a-jingle & a-jangled,


while,

your presence sparks the tinder,


setting every fibre afire,


aching,

hungering,


yearning with silent desire,


for the ache felt,

when dreaming of your exquisite kiss,


is,


an ache akin to a state of bliss,


an ache enveloping mind,

body,

soul,


an aching hope,

infusing my being entire,


complete,


whole …



Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google




strange are the ways of fate,

stranger still,

is my aching heart,


my thud-thudding heart,

’tis all yours,

through and through,


why, you may ask,


but,

i have not a clue,


but ’tis true,

i don’t know why,


i miss you …






Artwork from Google

Artwork from Google



flickering moonbeams …




on ancient shores

retracing steps


wet sand beneath bare feet


sipping kisses

hungry


sweet.




in distant streams


soul heart body mind

bathed as one


in sundrenched streams


flowing

ebbing

teasing

tugging


tasting

lapping

meandering


breathing caresses


wildly flickering

like

giddy moonbeams


on the cool wet sands


of

our beach of dreams …





w a n d e r l u s t

Artwork from Google





wanderlust …




the exquisite joys of being awestruck by this sublime, ever so diverse world of ours,


daydreaming of  adventures yet to be savoured, in the wee hours,


thoughts of two friends casting of all suburban shackles that so tightly bind,


on the open road ahead, intoxicated by the thoughts of glorious surprises this world may offer us, knowing that there shall be so many yet to find.




dreams of lush rainforests, deep and dense,


infusing the being in every sense,


dreams of cultures obscure yet to be fully diluted by so many a camera lens,


dreams of seeking out those wonders, and so many more, the path ahead seemingly strewn with adventurous presents galore.




two friends on a dreamy journey to soak in the sun on beaches so pure,


where coconuts dangle from palm trees, tangoing to the lilting music of waves lapping against the sea shore,


where all of our life’s travails may be sealed away for some time, all troubles to be banished behind a locked door,


as we swim the pristine seas, dazzled by sublime coral and fish weaving magic spells on the shallow sea floor.




lavish dreams of basking in the varied cultures that mingle together in our vast world,


where colours of life are painted on the canvas of voyages, the hues of soft pastel, sketched and with joy’s paintbrush swirled,


to be entranced by the marvellous cuisine that wherever we go is gloriously unfurled,


to flit in and out of gentle slumber, to the soft creaking of the hammock in which you lie peacefully curled.




these priceless treats await us just a ticket-to-go away,


if we could only put the daily grind that is our life on hold, while seeking respite, on the many paths that light the way,


if we could only untangle ourselves for a short while, from all of life that forces us to stay,


so that we may continue our dreamy quests, no longer mere serene dreams, but the start of adventures,


not in some vague tomorrow, hoping that life may give us some free time to borrow,


but just around the corner, let us leave later today,


if still only in dreams, of those waiting beaches, and of those palms that in the soft morning breeze do placidly sway … …




Artwork from Google



sidestepping shards of splintered glass, beyond the haze of billowing grass,


yesterday came, as today left, leaving me empty within, bereft,


so take my hand and walk with me awhile, beyond the tears, smuggling in a faint smile,


who knows the paths we’ll weave, as time trickles through its merciless sieve,


so take my hand and we’ll walk awhile,


a few steps today, and who knows,


tomorrow may be many a mile … …






Artwork from google




distant shores …



when you strolled into my life, ’twas beset with emptiness, restlessness, strife,


when you ambled into my world, ’twas but a maelstrom which bubbled and swirled,


when your hand took mine in yours, we shared the peacefulness of distant shores,


distant shores where troubles were washed away by the sea, where two souls merged, I into thee,


distant shores upon whose beaches we walked alone, leaving behind a world hardened as stone,


distant shores of love, joy, and of peace, where time itself felt it would cease,


ah! those distant shores of my silly dreams, crushed and broken by waking,

only to be ripped apart at the seams …




Baobab tree – artwork from google





sashaying …





sashaying to strains, melodies strumming my veins,


in low plateaus, through deepest vales,


soothing life’s pains,

banishing icy rains,


hushing sobs, shushing wails, grasping each day by its reins,


steering a course on the seas of fate,

where fear and trepidation pales,


free winds coaxing me ever onwards, forging fresh pathways, along unchartered trails,


with hope,

always with hope,


within sight of the lighthouse,


that ray of light,

keeping me ever afloat, bolstering my sails …



We THE People

from google





we the people.






as the forces of reaction grow louder, as the fascism of right-wing politics seem to be burgeoning, as the misogyny and racism and attacks on the rights of those who love differently echoes through the corridors of power, as all of this and so much more fills the air we breathe with a noxious stench, may we the people resist! may we the people erect the barricades, may we the people look back to all those brave and courageous souls who stood upright and fought the battles of yesterday – and not give in to despondency, may we the people resist and in resisting may we send a clear and resounding message to the forces that choose to divide, not unite, engender narrow nationalism not fraternal internationalism, may our message to them be clear, concise and loud – no pasaran! you shall not pass, for though you may wield the whip of power, we the people shall not give in to your tunnel vision of the politics of hate and divisiveness, for We The People always have been, and shall remain many, many more. Take heed of history for you stand rickety on the losing side and lose you shall, despite your gains here and there, lose you shall and lose you will, for We The People have been and always shall be many, many more. many more than the 1%, many more than the vultures of capital and greed, many more than you are, and ever shall be. 




We The People are many, many more.




Amandla!


Venceremos!


Aluta Continua!


We SHALL Overcome!





Jazz Artwork from Google



hugging hope …




years days moments minutes hours months weeks decades,


pockmarked,

weary,


skidding,

clinging onto,

raging roads,


hobbled,

shovelled,

dragged deep,


wrestling demons without,

within,


yet always,

always,


hugging hope,



as night yawns,

and a new day dawns …




Artwork from Google

in love with hope

artwork from google




in love with hope …




she comes to me,

offering solace, gentle words whispered in my ear,


she placates me,

her words a tender caress, dispelling fear,


she seduces me, as sure as she breathes fire into my soul,


she teases me, offering glimpses of the promise of being whole,


she heals me, when i’m down, battered blue black,


she picks me up, shuffling my self as bones achingly crack.




in love with her, i know now, without her, i would not cope,


in love with her, i know now, she is abiding hope,


hope lives,

hope breathes,


always … …



Picasso’s ‘Dove of Peace’ – artwork from google

artwork from google





hope …



fingers raw, bruised and sore,
masks stripped, truth tearing at the core,

feelings forgotten, discarded and rotten,
emptiness scratching at the bottom,

moments fungal, trapped in this desolate jungle,
scalding pride to ashes cold and humble,

dreams trashed, memories adrift, lashed,
wheels of lives callously slashed …


still, yet, always,


hope persists,

through life’s turns and twists,


hope never dies,


hope resists …



artwork from google



Ndebele Artwork – South Africa



the veiled connection … 


when two souls connect, far beyond the constraints of place, of that or of this lifetime,


when two hearts connect, thud-thuddingly beating to the same rhyme,


when two minds connect, forging a kinship beyond the shackles of merciless time,


a veiled connection, an intricately woven bouquet of emotions begin to intertwine.




the connection that fuses, melding two people, must be restrained by circumstance and societal norms,


the connection that fuses, melding two people, can hardly be truly known, for love appears in infinite forms,


the connection that fuses, melding her thoughts with mine, caresses each moment as each moment magically transforms.




such are the frivolous machinations of fate,


such are the oblivious workings of time, at times too early, at times just a second or two too late,


such are the truths we realise but at what cost, for the key handed down to us may not be for our specific gate.




the random sense of humour that destiny and fate do often betray, leaves scars, not smiles along the way,


the random sense of humour that life often displays, condemns a soul to the bleakness of the foggy grey,


the random sense of humour that determines who loves, and who doesn’t, seem like a trick that the rolling dice of fate may play.




the timing of a veiled connection forged in destiny’s blurry haze, leaves hearts and souls scorching, ablaze,


the timing of a veiled connection often determines the bends in many pathways, rarely missing a beat to reduce feelings into a series of tragi-comic plays,


and so it goes, that the timing of a veiled connection is crucial to the direction the pendulum of love sways,


more often than not abandoning souls,


to be forever lost in an indecipherable maze …



Ndebele Artwork – South Africa




https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esther_Mahlangu